Eureka!

Ladies and gentlemen, I have finally found the solution to all my spider-related problems:

Voila! The Keep Your Distance Bug Vacuum! Now I can kill spiders from two feet away! Well actually, I could before too, but it usually involved me shrieking a lot and flinging the nearest cat at the offending bug in the hopes that the cat would pounce and kill the nasty little thing. Unfortunately, our cats are lazy and overfed, so this approach seldom panned out. *le sigh*

Although you know, after looking at this thing for a while, I'm not sure that it would really work all that well here in Oz. I mean - can you really see it sucking up one of the massive, hairy spiders that regularly turn up in my house (or in the news)? Because if it got stuck in there, thrashing around or something, well...I might just have to flee the state.